Grief writing exercise
If you feel that the timing is right and you have experienced a loss that is related to your endometriosis, we recommend you try this writing exercise. The exercise involves writing continuously for fifteen minutes (15 min) four days in a row. Set a stopwatch to ring after 15 minutes.
You should preferably write by hand and at a time when you know you will not be disturbed and you have time and space for reflection. Write completely uncensored about the thoughts and feelings that come up. Remember: You are the ONLY one who will read this. It often happens at the beginning of such a writing exercise that there will be a phase of "garbage can", where you are really pathetic, angry, victimized, or even pathetic. You are allowed to.
Along the way, a wiser voice may emerge, showing a more constructive way to learn to live with your condition and circumstances. It is all part of the process. But, if you are overwhelmed by anxiety or other discomfort, stop and do something else instead, but do not be afraid of intense emotions as long as you feel you can handle them.
Day 1
Allow your deepest thoughts and emotions about your loss related to endometriosis to flow freely across the paper. Try to write specifically about the situation, what happened, who was involved and how did you experience it?
Day 2
You can choose to write about the exact same thing as on day 1 or you can let your thoughts flow. Still, the focus is on writing freely and uninterrupted for 15 minutes. Allow yourself to have all the thoughts and emotions you have, they can both be contradictory and politically incorrect, but in this exercise, they are all allowed.
Now try to write about how your experiences in relation to endometriosis have affected you - both in the past, today, and how it will affect you in the future. How has it changed you and how has it changed your relationships with other people? Also write about what part of the situation you are responsible for yourself, whether it is a very small part or a very large part.
Day 3
Do what you did on the previous two days. Continue exploring your experience. Also, try to reflect on which of the four grief tasks you are experiencing the most right now and in what way. You may want to try placing your grieving process (the tasks) on a timeline.
Have your experiences changed your view of yourself, other people's view of you, or your view of others? Have you learned anything from the experience? And has it changed your life for better or worse?
Day 4
Continue in the same way as the previous days. Leave room to freely explore your thoughts and emotions about the experience, but also try to leave room to write about how you will take your experience into the future.
What impact can you expect?
You may find that in the days following the writing exercise, you will feel emotions and think about experiences you had otherwise forgotten, and you may feel more vulnerable than you normally do. After a few days, this will subside, maybe even ease you up inside, but you may find yourself experiencing more different emotions than you are used to. It is not because there is anything wrong with you - emotions are natural and you have just become more in touch with them. If you are unsure whether the exercise has brought up thoughts, emotions, or behaviors that you cannot handle, consult your doctor, a psychologist, or someone else you trust.
Many people experience the immediate effect of the writing exercise as greater clarity about their experiences and more mental and emotional calmness.
Below you will find the writing exercise as a worksheet for download.
Enjoy writing!
